What a person says is perceived by others according to how they say it. A person may make a sarcastic or humorous comment that is deemed offensive by another because the tone of voice did not reflect the intended emotion behind the comment.
For this reason it is important your child is aware of using appropriate intonation in their public speaking. This subtle aspect of verbal communication could make all the difference between success and failure in public speaking.
Intonation is the change in pitch which takes place in a person’s speech. Certain words in certain sentences will require more emphasis than others and thus will be spoken in a different pitch. For example, if you are asking someone to shut a door and you want to say it politely you would most likely put the emphasis on please: “Can you shut the door please”? If you were angry with someone you would put emphasis on any of the other words: “Can you shut the door “?
Intonation is something we absorb and use subconsciously. But here are some tips to help your child get accustomed to mastering it for full affect in public speaking.
·Singing lessons: Providing your child with a few singing lessons could be the most fun and effective way of improving their understanding and use of intonation. Singing requires the singer to feel for the right pitch and tone to hit the right notes. After a few lessons your child may acquire a natural feeling for using the right tone and be able to flex between pitches easily within a sentence. This flexibility is essential for public speaking. In the space of a sentence your child may be required to move from one emotion to the exact opposite especially if delivering a joke which has an anti-climactic punchline.
·Poetry: Reading poems will help your child see where the emphasis should fall, for example, in rhyming words.
·Listen to other speeches or public speaking examples such as news broadcasts.
I was a professional stand-up comic for over two years, an experience I draw on to help those whom I coach to gain practical skills in public speaking. However, I don't teach humour, for one simple reason: it can’t be taught.
Despite that I can give you some tips to help your children use humour in their public speaking:
1. Pick a good target. Every joke needs a victim, and there's always a risk that you'll offend a member of the audience if any of them feel they're like the victim you're describing. The target could be something seen as being universally unpopular (which for children could be homework or exams). However, a much safer bet is to make yourself the target, a technique used by stand-up comics to great effect. Stories of embarrassing or annoying situations can be very entertaining in retrospect, and for a child to make themselves the victim of the humour shows great maturity.
2. Use humour sparingly. If the audience feels that you're only trying to make them laugh then its effect is diminished because there's no surprise. Throwing in unexpected comedy moments keeps the audience on their toes, and therefore interested.
3. Play it straight. The best actors know that delivering a line for laughs doesn't work; instead, deliver the line with absolute conviction, so you come across as naturally funny.
4. Don't be self conscious. If you are you will find yourself omitting jokes that work because you fear they will not go down well. Leave your inhibitions aside and try a variety of different styles of humour. It can be difficult to face blank stares but eventually you will find a comfortable technique that makes people laugh.
As we mentioned in part one, we are now entering a connection economy which makes the challenges your children will face very different from those you currently do and once did. However, with the right level of confidence, self esteem, creativity and communication skills, (let’s call this the connection economy toolkit) your children will face a world that provides more freedom (creatively at least), value and reward.
To elaborate, self employment in creative businesses will take on the esteem and worth that corporate work once provided. We can go further and say there will be very few of such jobs available as corporations continue to streamline processes (getting fewer people to do the same amount of work).As for blue collar or manual labour jobs, they will be non-existent in ten years time as a result of automation.
So what is needed to equip your child with the connection economy toolkit? A good education will be the foundation. But education is not restricted to the classroom. Encourage your child to take part in activities that boost all the components of the connection economy toolkit.
Joining a children's public speaking club is one way of providing your child with all the components:
·Confidence & self esteem: As your child gains more experience of speaking in front of an audience and having their views listened to they will feel a reinforcement of their value as an individual, as somebody people are willing to give time to. They will be more likely to express and share their ideas as they grow older; and ideas are the highest valued currency in the connection economy.
Fur Further, as your child learns to craft arguments to be delivered in speeches they will learn the importance of coherent presentation. Thus they will gain experience in executing their ideas for maximum results. With each speech that goes down well their confidence in their ideas, their presentation/execution and in themselves will grow.
·Creativity: To be creative means to think originally. In the connection economy a lot of original thinking will be needed because there are a lot of problems to be solved.
By following certain techniques for speech writing your child will develop, over the years, a problem solving mindset. Such a mindset will help them to spot where there are opportunities. In tandem with confidence, self esteem and communication skills they can apply this mindset to “join the dots” and set up the projects and businesses which will further fuel our global connection economy. (And the Nobel Peace Prize for 2023 goes to…)
·Communication Skills: As obvious as this one is, let us briefly summarise. By getting involved in public speaking your child will learn about intonation, eye contact, writing clearly and concisely, reading and projecting body language, emotional intelligence, vocal projection and many more ingredients of first rate communication skills.
Do you think the classroom can provide your child with the connection economy tool kit?
Social skills will affect many aspects of a person’s life: friendship, work and education. They are essentially a person’s ability to connect with others; and as we now live in a connection economy (think social media and technology that brings people together and the heightened value of creativity) that is more important than ever.
Public speaking will help your child develop first rate social skills. The bedrock of social skill is confidence. That does not mean your child has to be an extrovert who talks about themselves all the time, bragging about their achievements.
Confidence is a hugely misunderstood and often ill applied word. Introverts are often more confident than extroverts. A better term is self worth. Your child will get this by gaining a deeper understanding of self as they explore ideas for speech topics. They will look at issues in the world around themthat resonate deeply and form opinions to argue for in their speeches. As they grow older and move deeper into society they will know what their personal values, principles and beliefs are and have the confidence to express them. This will make it easier for them to identify and build relationships with like minded people.
Body language is a major aspect of public speaking and social skill. In the latter children process signs of body language subconsciously and often misinterpret messages people are sending them, with negative consequences. In the former, children pick up not only how to interpret body language but how to use it effectively too.
Finally (for now), public speaking increases your child’s conversational skills. With a raised ability of expressing themselves it will be easier for them to connect with other children who share similar interests.
Public Speaking teaches you more than how to articulate your beliefs and thoughts to an audience. It teaches you how to think critically and independently; how to use your body to communicate as much as your mouth; how to research and write compelling arguments; and how to listen to others.
All of the above are essential for attaining and more importantly enjoying a high level of education. But the most crucial of all is critical thinking. Your child may be able to memorise mathematical theory and use a calculator, and internalise historical facts and learn how to spell, but what your child needs to learn is the ability to think independently, to form coherent beliefs and express them, to be able to question the world around them and maybe even come up with some answers (this, after all, is why the platitude “children are our future” is thrown around so often).
By researching for speeches your child will learn how to investigate, how to rationalise arguments and present solutions to the challenges we face in a rapidly developing world where each problem solved leads to another created.
In addition, in order to succeed in any subject at school your child will need a certain level of confidence. They will need to speak up when they are stuck on something, they will need to communicate to their teachers where they are having difficulties, perhaps even in front of the whole class. By taking part in fun and non-pressurised public speaking activities in the home or by joining a local club with other kids, your child can pick up the confidence and communication skills they need to succeed in the classroom and then thrive in the world.
Welcome to our four
part series on the benefits your children can gain from learning the art of
public speaking.
The landscape of life has drastically changed over the past
few years. We now have a completely different economic outlook, and no it is
not one of uncertainty. Quite the opposite. In a nutshell, the future belongs
to independent thinkers, to those with motivation, drive and initiative and
most importantly of all, those with first rate communication skills.
Why?
Corporate industry is decaying. It cannot provide the jobs
it used to as the economy it was rooted in has changed. Add to this the growing
automation of labour work and your children will leave school to find there are
no jobs available (according to the current definition of jobs). The jobs that
are "available" (not self made) will be highly
skilled, professional and managerial.
But where there will be most work is in what entrepreneur,
writer and public speaker Seth Godin calls the “connection economy”.
Essentially this is where individuals have the creativity, the confidence
and the communication skills to get up and create something for themselves. Not
necessarily companies worth millions, but, for example, blogs, YouTube channels and
online (even offline) communities which provide something unique, of value
and can solve problems; thus leading to further paid opportunities to solve
more problems. (One example is how British comedy producer Armando Iannuucci found
a writer to add to the team for his award winning sitcom The Thick of It by
coming across a blog).
Over the years parents we know have expressed concern that
schools are not providing the skills their children need to thrive in the
connection economy.
This is where Public Speaking for Kids can help. Public
speaking can provide your child with the articulation, the creative
thinking processes to join the dots and make connections, and the
communication skills to reach out to others and make a mark in the connection
economy.
How?
We shall explain in parts 2 to 4 coming later this week.
As parents and teachers we at Public Speaking for Kids
understand that raising a successful child is not an easy thing to do. It is
difficult to define success first of all; and the metric which must be avoided
at all costs is comparison to other children, be they your neighbour's sons and
daughters or teeny bopping global superstars!
From our twenty plus years of experience we have learnt success in raising children comes from ignoring that very concept.
At Public Speaking for Kids we believe a successful child is
one who grows to be content and happy, takes on challenges, learns from mistakes and contributes value to the world around them. Raising a successful child is not, as many
parents write to us saying, gearing them towards
certain universities, careers and salaries. It is about giving them the
chance to learn, discover and think independently and be content and happy with
their findings and conclusions.
But how is this done?
Parents of the previous generation- those who raised us-
thought this could be done simply by sending their kids to school, ensuring
they did their homework when they came home, giving them food, clothing and
shelter and allowing them to stay up late every Saturday. But the school system
and social challenges children face today mean parenting has to be proactive;
you have to develop a solid friendship with your child: you cannot rely on
trust and authority simply because you share flesh and blood.
In order to facilitate discovery of self (rather than what
society expects) your child will need to be assertive. And for this, and
anything else in life, first rate communication skills are required. This
is why we are so keen to promote
the art of public speaking to children.
By teaching your child public speaking you will be giving
them confidence, writing skills, improved memory, problem solving abilities, strong vocal projection and awareness and understanding of that
silent but unnoticed decision maker in so many important aspects of life: body
language.
In the headline we promised to tell you what it takes to
raise a successful child. Now you have the answer you were not expecting:
teach them how to express themselves eloquently and confidently- in the simplest yet
most fun way possible- so they grow to be content and happy.
By now you will have surely downloaded and worked through our A-Z
guide with your children. If the tips are applied correctly and consistently they will
be on their way to becoming world class public speakers with exceptionally
bright futures.
However, good public speakers (and good teachers of public
speaking), cover aspects beyond the obvious such as speech
topics, speech
writing exercises and rehearsal
techniques. Therefore today we will
focus on a subtle area which could make all the difference between your child being a public speaking amateur and a public speaking champion.
Here are some games you can play with your children/pupils
to help them pronounce words correctly.
Shadow Reading
Choose a piece of audio, for example a classic speech from
history, an excerpt from a film or an audio book. Make sure you and your child each
have a transcript of the recording. Ask your child to read the transcript aloud
then listen to the recording with them to see if they have pronounced each word
correctly. This will also give them the chance to improve their tone, pace and
overall delivery.
Odd One Out
At a fast pace pronounce
a number of words in a series with the same vowel sound. Near the middle, subtly include a word that sounds slightly different. After you have pronounced them all ask your
child to tell you the odd one out. Then give them a chance to test you.
For example you can list: vowel, towel, foul, howl, jowl, double, owl, bowel, Powell. (Read these out
aloud to yourself and you will see it is not as easy as it looks)!!!!!!
Mute Mouth
Without making the actual sounds move your mouth as if you
were going to say certain words and challenge your child to decipher what words you
are using.
Remember, some words are pronounced differently in British English
than in American. To discover the difference refer to the Free Dictionary online and type in
your chosen word. It will give you a recording of both pronunciations.
As parents we often think it is our children’s
responsibility to learn, but forget this can only be possible if somebody takes
the responsibility to teach them, whether that is a school teacher, a parent or
a YouTube tutor!
We parents take it for granted that our children will learn
certain things. Do we not assume, without much consideration, they will learn
to walk, talk and eat?
Another assumption we are making is that they will learn to
communicate effectively just by going through the motions of life: having
friends, talking to us parents and being in the classroom. They will certainly pick up the basics this
way, but the world is changing.
The subtle things can have the most impact. As we enter a
world that is, on the surface, being made simpler by technology, such progress
is revealing social, political, economic and ethical complexities which the
next generation will be left to deal with when they begin to climb the career
ladder and enter the world of parenthood themselves. At the root of solving
problems is the ability to communicate well- read the autobiography of any
business or political leader. (And it is not only people on the world stage who
are leaders- think of middle managers, parents, doctors, teachers and social
workers- things which your children may be in the future).
At school, communication does not fall into the curriculum.
It is expected to be picked up through English and Drama. But this is not
enough to prepare your child for the world outside.
If you want to avoid raising a zombie who can only grunt,
groan, re-pin and re-tweet and hope this will land him or her their perfect
job, marriage and whatever else they may want- then raising a confident,
articulate child will require the pro-active teaching of something our
generation took the learning of for granted: communication skills.
This is why a growing extracurricular activity amongst
children aged 7 to 15 is public
speaking.
Public speaking is a fun and inexpensive activity that can
be taught and practised in the home and/or as part of a wider club or community
such as Toastmasters. It can increase your child’s bond with you, their
confidence, ability to express themselves, their overall communication skills
and thus their social lives, school grades and career potential.
From fun games to develop vocal projection and prompt thinking through to speech
researching and writing
exercises and actual presentations to audiences -competitive or not- public
speaking is a growing and highly effective way of pro-actively teaching your
child the communication skills they are not directly taught at school but will
need in order to face the challenges of our rapidly changing world.
